1st March, 2002.
TEACHER: | Why are you late? |
WEBSTER: | Because of the sign. |
TEACHER: | What sign? |
WEBSTER: | The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." |
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TEACHER: | Cindy, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor? |
CINDY: | You told me to do it without using tables! |
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TEACHER: | John, how do you spell "crocodile"? |
JOHN: | "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" |
TEACHER: | No, that's wrong |
JOHN: | Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it! |
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TEACHER: | What is the chemical formula for water? |
SARAH: | "HIJKLMNO"!! |
TEACHER: | What are you talking about? |
SARAH: | Yesterday you said it's H to O! |
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TEACHER: | George, go to the map and find North America. |
GEORGE: | Here it is! |
TEACHER: | Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? |
CLASS: | George! |
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TEACHER: | Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. |
WILLY: | Me! |
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TEACHER: | Tommy, why do you always get so dirty? |
TOMMY: | Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are. |
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SILVIA: | Dad, can you write in the dark? |
FATHER: | I think so. What do you want me to write? |
SYLVIA: | Your name on this report card. |
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TEACHER: | Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I". |
ELLEN: | I is... |
TEACHER: | No, Ellen. Always say, "I am." |
ELLEN: | All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." |
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Teacher: | "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" |
Johnny : | "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day same time." |
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Teacher: | "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" |
Johnny : | "Because George still had the axe in his hand." |
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Teacher: | Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? |
Sam : | No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. |
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Teacher: | Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his? |
Desmond: | No, teacher, it's the same dog! |
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Teacher: | What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? |
Pupil : | A teacher. |